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Pain
Lessons: Learning to Heal by Ellie O'Steen, LMT Pain
Management As we were discovering about the temperaments, in Lesson Three, we said that each temperament had its strengths and weaknesses.So, now let's meet each of the four basic temperaments and get to know them..... Sparky Sanguine: warm, buoyant, lively, and an enjoying-life person. Feelings predominate his decisions. He is so outgoing and has such a great capacity for enjoying himself . He touches others with his fun-loving spirit. Those are Sparky's strengths. In the weakness category (and important in how he will deal with adversity) Sanguines tend to be weak-willed, undisciplined, and unproductive at times. They tend to overeat and can gain weight easily. This can be a real concern to the chronic pain survivor. In Sparky, there is a tendency towards emotional inconsistency. They can cry easily but can also instantly erupt into an angry rage. Sanguines also tend towards being disorganized and seldom plan ahead. This, too, can be a problem in coping with pain since there must be a certain amount of planning of one's day to stretch, take breaks, plan ahead so that you are not stressed by rushing and planning your day so you don't get overtaxed, etc. The sanguine will probably never be a perfectionist but they do need quite a bit of organization to their life. LaHaye states that for the sanguine, "when things go wrong, he has no difficulty convincing himself that whatever he did was justified". Real honesty is necessary to assess the whys of flare-ups and making excuses or passing blame doesn't get it. Question: How do you imagine Sparkys would cope with constant pain? Next, let's meet Rocky Choleric! Rocky is hot, quick, active, practical, strong-willed, self-sufficient and very independent. He tends to be decisive and opinionated. He thrives on activity! (red flag here!!) He has endless ideas, plans, goals and ambitions and a practical, keen mind to formulate those ideas. (another red flag for frustration of not getting to do all they want). He has dogged determination which usually allows him to succeed where others don't. (good trait to get through some difficult days). Emotionally, Rocky does not sympathize easily with others nor naturally show or express compassion. He tends towards being domineering and bossy. Rocky's weaknesses are that he is self-sufficient, impetuous, unforgiving, angry, cruel at times, and tends towards hostility. The emotional rigidity of this temperament is likened to a "walking Mount Vesuvius", as LaHaye states. (Red flag here! All that emotion pushed down inside can increase pain levels) The natural tendency of determination is an asset since it takes determination to set goals and try to reach them each day pain or no pain. This tendency can make for good coping mechanisms IF the weakness tendencies are not indulged. OK, it's time to meet Martin Melancholy. You'll like him! I bet that many of you will recognize yourself in Marty! Marty is analytical, self-sacrificing, gifted, perfectionist and with a sensitive emotional nature. Since feelings predominate {did you pick up on that red-flag?}, there is a variety of moods. Sometimes he's on a high of delight and pleasure; at other times he will be gloomy and depressed. He seldom pushes himself forward to meet people but likes people. He finds it difficult to express his true feelings. He has an excellent analytical ability to diagnose accurately the many obstacles of any project he undertakes. Therefore, he is often reluctant to initiate some new project. Marty finds his greatest meaning in life through personal sacrifice and often is in a service profession. This temperament carries a serious disadvantage of negativism and criticism. While Marty analyzes life, his weaknesses find him to be moody, persecution-prone, revengeful, self-centered, and unsociable. The melancholic tends to also be very dissatisfied with oneself! (red flag!) They tend to compare themselves with others, invariably feeling deficient. There is a tendency towards slow-burning anger, revengeful thinking and self-persecution. (that can really set up pain levels!) Mood swings are prevalent and the tendency towards depression is strong. This rigid and uncompromising trait also shows itself in intolerance and impatience with others as well as themselves. Question: Did you pick out some of those red-flags? And lastly, let's meet quiet, cool, easy-going Phil Phlegmatic. Phil almost never becomes angry and is easy to get along with. Life for Phil is a happy, unexcited, pleasant experience in which he avoids as much involvement as possible. He does not lack for friends and his dry sense of humor draws many to him. He has the unique capability for seeing something humorous in others & he maintains a positive approach to life. Personally, I think these are the ones who tell you that you 'don't look ill or like you are in pain' !! It's great that they can see the positive while you are wishing you could share some of your pain with them!! Anyway, good ole Phil tends to be more of a spectator in life and is not often motivated to any form of activity beyond his daily routine. {do you see the red flag here? action is needed to control chronic pain} The phlegmatic does have some weaknesses but they seem to be happy with them! The phlegmatic tends towards being a procrastinator, selfish, self-protective, indecisive, fearful and a worrier but.....he does it all calmly and quietly and so , from the outside he looks so gracious and proper that most people are not aware of these tendencies. Phil phlegmatic can be most stubborn but is so diplomatic about it ! He simply 'does it his way' with little contention outwardly but not budging inwardly. This temperament, in my opinion, is difficult to work with in regards to making the needed changes to cope with chronic pain because often they don't want to change. I hope through meeting these four temperaments, you have recognized your primary and secondary temperaments. And, I think by understanding why we react to the same problem but in very different ways, we take the pressure off ourselves to compare ourselves to " so-and-so" or, question why we have more difficulty coping with some areas of life versus how someone else copes. Also, we can offer an explanation to anyone who may question our coping techniques! We don't need any more pressure than what we have!
Proverbs 30:11-14 NIV "There are those who curse their fathers and do not bless their mothers; Those who are pure in their own eyes and yet are not cleansed of their filth: Those whose eyes are ever so haughty, whose glances are so disdainful: Those whose teeth are swords and whose jaws are set with knives to devour the poor from the earth, the needy from among mankind." Personally, it doesn't surprise me that our Creator would speak these words through Solomon because there are many, many references to the emotions of mankind throughout the Proverbs and which are distinctly applicable to us today. Now, I sense a bit of impatience as to WHY we're learning about these temperaments!!! ...So that once you recognize how YOU approach goals and changes, you will be able to map out a plan to fit YOUR type. We will be learning to set goals in order to get better control over our pain and our lives and you need to understand how to best set these goals. Homework: Pick
out YOUR primary temperament. |
