We did not change as we grew older; we just became more clearly ourselves. Lynn Hall
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 Good
efforts that went just so far.
Treatment: Both conventional medical
treatment and complementary treatment have limits. At this point,
we only know so much about how to help people heal.
There comes a point where medically, what can be done has
probably been done. You can be grateful for what there was. You
may even need to accept that there is no
diagnosis for now. At
some point it is helpful not to insist that there is more. Don't
give up hope or exploring, but don't make search for a cure in
the future stop you from making the changes that are called
for now.
Force of will: We sometimes just try
harder and harder doing the same things. This is often helpful,
but it does not make a condition go away. Being tough, determined
or positive enough, or praying enough are good but not always the
answer. You may still have what you've got.
Waiting: Many conditions are temporary,
and get better over time. Chronic ones, by definition, last,
though maybe not forever. Let's assume that you've waited
patiently, and you still have the condition.
Other sources of help: You may have gone
for various kinds of help ( medical, psychological, spiritual,
emotional), and this may have been good to do. But your condition
still has not been completely resolved.
Deciding it's not important: You may have
carried on as though nothing had changed. Seeing a significant
situation as a small one is part of how we cope at first. But if
it IS important, it needs your attention. There may be some
things you can do that will really help.
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What is Acceptance?
Acceptance is not giving up.
At least, it is not giving up trying. It is
giving up thinking that things are not different now, or that you
don't have to deal with this in a new way. Accepting what is
happening, you can start to take positive action.
It means not fighting pain but working with it. Fighting pain
usually means denying or ignoring limitations, which can lead to
overdoing things and flare ups/set backs.
Acceptance
does not mean “forever”.
You can accept that you have a problem at least for now.
Maybe it will resolve in the future. That would be wonderful. You
can accept that at present, you have a condition that demands some
kind of adjustment.
Acceptance
is not liking.
You don't have to like something to accept it. You just have to
be willing to recognize it for what it is, and be willing to act
accordingly.
Acceptance
is the willingness to say, “Yes, this IS happening”
and to move forward doing your best with what you have.
When you admit “This is real”, you are beginning to
accept. When you then say “How will I deal with it”,
you are there.
The Guest House
This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they are a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice.
meet them at the door laughing and invite them in.
Be grateful for whatever comes.
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond.
Rumi
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Resolution 1: Acceptance